I don’t know you guys. I just don’t know.
I am in desperate need of getting the whole family on the same sleep page. Last night I had a touch of what life could be like again and it was glorious. Allow to splain. No, there isn’t time, let me sum up.
Hannah sleeps through the night about 4 days a week. The other nights she fluctuates between grumpy groan crying and full out screaming. Grumpy groans we let ride, but then we’re on edge for most of the night waiting for the shrieks to begin. Shrieking nights, she’s usually like “Yup, I had my nap, now let’s PLAY!” and we spend the next 4 hours trying to convince her that it’s nighttime which is when night sleeping happens and day time is for naps and play.
Shelby had insomnia for a while that kinda turned into a reverse sleep cycle. He is usually up pretty late at night and then spends the whole day sleeping on the floor in various rooms while Hannah throws toys, remote controls, video games, and food all over the place. Or, you know, pulls ever last wipe out of the bag cuz they’re wet and weird and taste like magic.
I can’t sleep when my ducks aren’t all accounted for. If Shelby is “supposed” to be beside me in the bed and is not, I am anxious. When Hannah has slept several nights in a row, I am anxious. When I can’t remember the last time I saw the cat and am convinced I accidentally locked him in the shed, I am anxious. I toss and turn, wake with a start every hour or so, and am constantly running around the house trying to track all of the occupants. And then I go to work where the frown pretty heavily on sleeping at your desk.
I am very tired.
Hannah has been up a couple nights recently. We switched her to whole milk and she has been much more gassy. Early on, she had a few spit ups but that seems to have settled. Tuesday night she grumpy moaned for about 20 minutes at midnight, but slept well otherwise. Regardless, I was on edge. Shelby was up until almost 6am. I slept restlessly, waking often and finding it hard to fall back asleep. Wednesday was exhausting.
So last night, I fell asleep on the couch at about 9:30. Shelby sent me up around 10 and I did my evening routine of crunches and cat cow bows before sliding under the covers and reading a book. Well, opening a book, reading three words and crashing out. The cat came and snuggled in under the covers with me. Shelby came up “early” and messed around on the computer but he was in bed beside me and that’s what really mattered. Hannah slept through. I woke up once at 3:11a but all were accounted for and I fell right back asleep. I slept hard until my alarm went off this morning.
I am still tired, but I feel rested. A rare phenomenon indeed. I feel like I can accomplish something today rather than feeling like my brain is stuffed with pillows. Even the simplest tasks have lately felt like overwhelming feats of mental gymnastics. Today I can look at an email and understand what it means.
Sleep. It really is important.